Monday, October 28, 2013

Week of Losses - But Not Really


Last week was not my finest performance and it took my wife pointing out my folly before I felt functional again. Whether it was an adjustment earlier on in the week that bent my attitude in the wrong direction or just life in general, I wasn't on a happy path and my family was feeling the brunt of my negative vibes. Looking over some of what I wrote in the book I'm authoring it shows in the story, the dialog, the general tone - kind of a downer feeling.

The end of the week somewhat ended like the beginning  though much of it was out of my sphere of responsibility. It was just ironic that 3 out of the 4 sporting events we participated in (2 soccer matches, a HS Homecoming game and the Dallas Stars game) were losses for our side and the one that wasn't was never played. By the weekend I was on the good attitude path and even the losses weren't getting me down.

Sometimes life throws at us challenges that surprise us and other times their expected, but what I learned this last week was to be challenged in my expectations and to be surprised by the outcomes. I have a loving wife that knows just when to ask the right question, probe enough to let me tell what's in my heart and to give me distance to smolder when needed. She loves me endlessly and for her I am eternally grateful. Yesterday there was a comment in our Stake Conference related to providing temple work for our kindred dead but it made me grateful for covenants I've made in this life. The gist of the remark was that couples that had been civilly married in this life were in an enforced separation in the life hereafter when not sealed by the Holy Spirit of Promise. What a sad and despairing thought to know that my beloved to whom I pledge and give my all to in this life would not be with me endlessly because I failed to receive the covenant of eternal marriage and be sealed to her. How grateful I am that this is not the case and that we work together to realize the full potential of our marriage covenant and blessings.

I feel like I'm blessed with friends that get me. More than just friends that laugh when I'm not all that funny to appease me or laugh at me when I make one of my plethora of guffaws. I mean real friends that mourn with me when I'm down, lift me up when I'm weak and rejoice with me when I can full sing songs of praise and gratitude. I am enveloped by such great friends that they love me for my foibles and rather than turn their backs and walk away they invite me to work through my issues with them. I've had very few friends as true as the ones I have now and I thank God everyday for them. While the quote was meant more towards our attitude in which we come to and hold God in our lives, I feel like it applies to my friends and hopefully me towards them: "The crowning characteristic of love is loyalty." - Elder Jeffrey R. Holland. While loyalty among friends is nice, and likely sometimes over emphasized to the degradation of other relationships, a loyalty to God in a friendship is how I believe my friends exhibit their love and I truly appreciate it!

Lastly, and certainly not of the greatest importance in my life, I feel grateful over a loss I experienced this week. Over the last 3 years I've had a great weight that has gradually been lifted and this weekend marked a turning point in my life. I stepped on the scale on Saturday morning and saw my weight drop below 180 lbs and I literally fist pumped in silence in my bathroom. It may not seem like a big thing but to have started at 215 lbs, my heaviest ever weight, just 5 months ago and now to be within 10 lbs of my target goal, I'm ecstatic. It's one loss in my life that I'm truly grateful to have. I attribute the success to a jump start diet my wife recommended and later revoked (wise woman), crazy running schedule (early mornings just work for me) and more self control in my eating habits. I feel great, my knees don't hurt and I feel more self confident. Just 9 lbs left and the holiday temptations ahead; I got this!

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